Sometimes I have to give myself a Working Mom Pep Talk. Being a Working Mom is hard. I knew it would be and I was right. As the kids get older, it is actually getting harder to be a Working Mom. That was surprising. But I am the worst kind of Working Mom there is. I like being a Working Mom. I would probably work even if I didn't "have to". I don't feel guilty for being a Working Mom. I feel guilty for not feeling guilty. I was ready to go back to work. I am a good Working Mom.
Don't get me wrong. My kids are number 1. They are ahead of my job. They always come first. But it's hard when I hear people talk about how much they don't want to be a working mom but have to be. It's hard when I hear people talk about how hard it was to go back to work. It was hard for me too. But I never made a thing about it. I just did it. I couldn't put pictures of my kids in my cubicle for a year. If I did, I would have stared at the pictures too much. Even now, the pictures of my kids are on the side, away from my view. I would still stare at them if they were right in front of me. Sometimes I feel like I am being judged as being insensitive and an uncaring mom for being okay with working.
My kids are good kids and they are not being hurt by having a Working Mom. Sometimes I think they are better, stronger kids because of it. But that may be an excuse to make myself feel better.
So sometimes I just have to give myself the Working Mom Pep Talk. I'm a good mom. I'm a good Working Mom. I love my kids as much if not more than any other mother out there. And my kids know it. That is what matters. Not that I work. Not whether I feel guilty or not about it. That it's all about my kids... not me.