Sunday, July 21, 2013

A wedding... The vows

Sometimes it seems like the wedding ceremony is glossed over in the wedding preparations.  But the wedding ceremony is the most important part.  As our photography called it "the good stuff". 

I think going to weddings should be required of all married people.  Go to as many weddings as you can. Crash the ceremonies if you have to.  When we were first married, we would go to weddings and remember our own.  The anticipation.  Walking down the aisle... The reception afterwards. 

Yesterday was different.  We have been married for almost 9 years now.  It seemed cliché at the time when everyone would talking about "the good times and the bad times".  When you are first married, it is the good times.  You can't imagine the "bad times".  We have been married long enough to have some bumps in the road... little ones and big ones.  I couldn't have imagined at the time the journey we would go through and are still on.  But even though the most difficult times, I know that I am married to the right person and that the tough times are times that you get through - they aren't about the person you married.

A wise women once said that when she was going through some tough times with her husband she would watch her wedding video.  Not to remember the love of that moment and the vows she said to her husband but to remember the vows she said to God.  The covenant she made was not only to her husband but also to God.

As we are going through "the tough times", I needed to see a wedding.  I needed to see that hope and to renew our vows with each other.  I don't think watching our wedding video would have had the impact of the vows that being in the middle of the wedding had for me.  I loved explaining all the traditions to Laci, especially the unity candle.  I love the unity candle and how it represents her family, his family and their new family newly created.  I keep my unity candle on my kitchen sink.  I can't think of a better place to keep it than right in the most used place in my house.  It is burned way down.  My mom offered to replace it with a new one.  I said no.  That burned down unity candle was at our wedding and is a daily reminder of our wedding and our vows, just like our rings

I wasn't sure why we were invited to the wedding.  We hadn't seen her in several years.  I would like to think I had bigger impact on her than I thought when she was a teenager.  But I really think that we were invited to that wedding because God knew that I needed to be at a wedding this summer.  He knew that I needed to experience that all again. 

Charlie pointed out the best line the pastor said at the wedding yesterday.... "Make sure that today is the day you love each other least."  I think that says it all.

Saturday, July 20, 2013

A wedding.... The Anticipation

We're going to a wedding this afternoon.  I am super excited.  I love weddings.  The celebration.  The love.  The hope.  The dresses.  The food.  The dancing.  The magic.  This is the first wedding we have taken the kids too.  I am really excited for them to experience that all too, if even in a child-like sense.  I hope Laci feels that magic too and sees the princess in the bride.

Whenever I go to a wedding, I start preparing days before.  I start remembering my wedding and the magic around it.  The rehearsal dinner.  The family coming into day.  Getting nails done.  Luncheons.  It's all part of the ritual and the magic.  I wake up that morning and remember the jitters I felt.  I remember getting my hair done.  Having my friends over for breakfast.  The special moment with my mom as she gave me her last minute gifts.... special gifts from my grandma and special things she had been saving for me my whole life for that day.  I remember waiting to go to the church being so nervous that my friend that was with me get giving me wedding presents to open! Nothing calms nerves like opening salt and peppers shakers.

I hope that Jillian is experiencing that magic right now.  I coached Jillian on my soccer team when she was a teenager and am really looking forward to seeing the young woman and now wife she has become.  I pray that for her today is not about a day but the start of their marriage and their life together.

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Visions of the past...

Calvin recently turned 3.  I have come to realize that 3 is a hard age for mothers, especially when it is her "baby" turning 3.  He is no longer a baby.  He is making the transition to "big boy".  He calls himself a "big boy" now.  He has a new room and a new bed.  No more crib.  No more changing table.  He drinks from a cup, no more lid.  Soon, he will be done with diapers and pull ups.  He gave up his pacifier by himself when he moved into the crib.  
When I look at Calvin, this is what I see.  Visions of the past.  
He was the most serious baby ever.  He is still pertty serious but finally laughs!

My baby!

I have to remind myself that this is what the rest of the world sees. 
He requested a spider man cake - even though he knows nothing about spider man. 
He got lots of spider man toys for his birthday!

He still demands to be carried more than he should be.  He's too old to be carried.  But he is my baby and he won't be carried forever.  Plus, it keeps me strong and my arms in great shape! 

Friday, July 12, 2013

My Elbow...

I never think about my elbow.  But my elbow fascinates Laci.  That little flap of skin that appears when I straighten my arm.  When we lay in bed and watch TV at night, she plays with that little flap.  It's like when people twirl their hair.  She plays with my elbow.  I have a scar on one elbow from when I was 4 years old and fell backwards off a picnic table onto a patio.  My elbow has history.  I feel like there should be a deep metaphor about the example I need to set because my daughter sees all of me, not just the parts I think about or know.  She sees all of me - my good parts and my faults.  My face that I show the world and my elbow that is never seen or looked at by anyone but her.  Maybe there is a deep metaphor and lesson in there.  Or maybe she just likes to play with that little flap of skin on my elbow.  

Monday, July 1, 2013

Feeling Strong!

Running makes me feel strong.  When I have a good run, I feel strong the rest of the day.  Strong is about the best word I can use to describe it.  Sore, but strong.  I signed up again for the CarmelFest 4.5 miles.  I feel like I am where I was at when I ran it last year.  And that was a disaster.  I am trying to feel more confident and the weather looks better for this run.  Last Monday morning, I signed up for the run.  Then at lunch, I didn't get the good treadmill and had a terrible run.  I only ran 3.3 miles, not my usual 4.5 miles.  Wednesday wasn't any better.  I forced myself to run 4 miles.  I wanted to redeem myself Friday but forgot my running clothes.  Sometimes a lunchtime walk does as much good as a good run.  Only 4 more days until the big CarmelFest run.  Today I got the magic treadmill.  And the magic was there.  I ran 4.55 miles in 38 minutes.  I have confident once again that I can run 40 minutes on Thursday.  And if not, at least I will have run 4.5 miles.  This afternoon, I felt strong.  I like to feel strong.  It's a good feeling.